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2010-12-19 / 9:04 p.m.

Haven't seen my bedroom floor in weeks. Haven't slept in my own bed in longer. I have been dubbed the special child which is just fine, but it's somewhat short of a positive title. Not at all complimentary.
Haven't driven with the snow in almost a month, walking everywhere with earphones in my ears so the wind can't make them hurt. Been carrying my old tamagotchi around in my pocket even though the battery's dead - I have the best of intentions.
You know, I am getting up at way too early o' clock in the morning to bring my mother to the hospital for an operation and I know that she's scared about it all but I don't know how to talk to her about it or to make her feel any better at all. I complained about having to be up before seven, but so what? She stayed up with me at night when I was little and my everything hurt. She let me in her bed when I cried.
It doesn't feel like Christmas, not properly.

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